Use Care with Your Words
October is Domestic Violence Awareness month – many people (most) have experienced verbal or emotional abuse. Much of that abuse came via our families, teachers, coaches, and even from our bosses and co-workers.
Amazingly, if you become an observer to conversations around you, you will see what I mean. Even much of our advertising is somewhat abusive. Any time someone puts you down, undermines you that can be considered emotional or verbal abuse.
For some of the abusers it is a habit, a way of life – and most of the time they became that way because that is what they were taught somewhere along the way. They really may never have been made aware of the damage they are doing to others or what to do to change it.
People who are the constant abusers usually have a low self-esteem and they abuse others for several different reasons, but it usually boils down to they want to have power over someone so that they can feel better. This goes for employers / bosses / managers, some coaches and teachers as well as spouses – women and men.
There is a misconception that women are always the victims and certainly they have the highest percentage of physical abuse, but when it comes to verbal and emotional abuse they are guilty. Just observe and you will often hear caustic comments about others, gossip (men are guilty here too) and undermining other women.
What’s wrong with this picture? Lots! And it would take a lot more time and informational statistics to share here than I want deluge on you. Pay attention everywhere you are – television shows, commercials, people in the workplace and you will see that verbal abuse is more prevalent than you realize. You’ve probably been a receiver of the abuse at least once or twice in your life, if not more frequently.
What can you do to make a difference? One way is to stop gossiping or putting anyone else down. Pause, take a step back and think to yourself, “would I want someone saying these things about me?” It matters not whether the information you are going to use to tear someone else down is true – it is their problem to deal with not yours . . . unless you can help!
Another way is to exhibit more kindness to everyone, even those people who are rude, treat you badly. By being kind or sending kind thoughts their way, you exhibit an example to them to “take the higher road” as we say, as well as be the change you want to see and experience in our world.
There is so much abuse of so many forms going on in the world and it’s ever being brought to our attention via all types of media. Take a look at how you are handling your situations and remember to treat others with kindness, don’t be an abuser.
And help our children, so many are treated so badly and they are the ones that will grow up to make decisions for us as we grow older. Let’s help them learn kindness and make the world a wonderful place.
When it comes to being kind, put yourself at the top of the list – be kind to and love you!
“I remember to love myself first and foremost. If I don’t love myself, no one else will.” – Anonymous
Margaret Martin ©2015